Focus on child's best interests improves ex-spouse relations | Fort ...
Formerly married couples who are able to put aside the contentiousness and bickering sometimes associated with a divorce and child custody dispute to focus on the best interests of the child will develop a better post-divorce relationship with each other, according to a study conducted by researchers at the University of Missouri. The study involved interviews with 20 women who were in joint custody arrangements with their former spouses.
A majority of the women interviewed for the study reported that their relationship with their former spouse went from contentious to cordial after both parents began focusing on the effect their combative relationship was having on their children. The study participants reported that communication with their former spouses was essential in the process of fostering and maintaining relationships between the children and both parents. The relationship between the former partners became more cordial and cooperative once the couples decided to put aside their own differences and concentrate on the relationship each parent had with the children.
When parties in a divorce fight over issues such as child custody, support and property rights, they can lose sight of the effect their conflict is having on the children. According to the study, couples who focus their attention on the impact their fighting is having on the children, instead of on their relationship issues with each other, learn to put aside their conflict. Becoming better parents helps to improve the relationship the parents have with each other. Divorce proceedings can be adversarial, but they do not have to have permanent impacts on children.
Source: Psych Central, "Focus on Kids Eases Conflict for Divorced Parents," Janice Wood, August 16, 2012
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